Lonely isn’t the right word, because I’m not upset about not having a large group of people I consider myself close to. It’s somewhat disappointing that I can’t deeply relate to more people, though. I’d like to meet more likeminded folks, but I’m also less and less willing to tolerate draining relationships as I get older. Being particular about where you invest your time and energy tends to be socially limiting.

I love the juxtaposition of sugar free Coke with sugar added Jack Daniels. Dodging and weaving against diabetes.

I’m a pet product specialist for a pet food manufacturer. I respond to customer emails, calls, and chats about our products. This could mean assisting pet owners in selecting products based on their pets’ unique medical or physiological needs, answering nutritional questions, handling complaints, and more. In my downtime I work on reference materials for the rest of the team, continuing education on animal nutrition (my last class was on avian flu in pet foods), and prepare promotional materials for expos and trade shows.

On light days we do a lot of sharing memes, shit talking in group chat, dicking around on the Internet, and finding other creative ways to fuck off.

Cats, very much so, for most of my life. I’ve enjoyed dogs, but cats have been my heart. While I was working at a shelter one of the dogs that arrived to us from a southern transport was a quiet, shy, but very sweet German Shepherd. It was love at first sight, and she never hit the adoption floor.

We were nervous to bring her home, because we didn’t know how she would react to the cats. It was seamless, and now she enjoys fussing over foster kittens when I have them. She’s opened my heart to dogs in a way I didn’t think was possible. We’re thankful for Ferda every day.

I do still categorize myself as a cat person, though.

I don’t think that would be the general case with humans under these kinds of circumstances. For most of history, women had many more children on average than we see in most of the world today. It was expected that many wouldn’t live past three years old in much of known, recorded history. I can only imagine in circumstances even more primitive than what we know of, something like this wouldn’t be as unthinkable as you’re describing.

No. Working in retail is a direct exchange of goods for money. You follow the policies of that establishment, or you take your business elsewhere. You don’t have an actual tantrum over something so trivial and get catered to.

I’m now in a position where I have autonomy over what I offer to customers, and I agree with your principle. It doesn’t apply in this situation, though.

Yes, let’s reward that behavior with a treat in front of other people.

This is a situation that’s a one-off where someone not used to the normal customer experience reacted unreasonably. If you give in and allow their behavior to override the rules of doing business with that establishment, you not only encourage that person to continue acting out to get their way, but you also send a problematic message to the customers watching this interaction.

I’m glad it was helpful! Staying zen in the face of an irate or confrontational customer isn’t easy, but it’s the most effective way I have found to manage these types of situations. Rules and policies are in place for a reason, and I’m not going to be bullied into unfairly breaking rules for an asshole. If people are nice and respectful I will do everything in my power to assist however I can, but entitled people need to stop being catered to. The fact that their behavior gets them what they want is exactly why they treat people this way.

I’ve been in customer service in various roles for over twenty years. I’ve spent the last six in different positions in animal shelters, veterinary clinics, and am currently at a pet food manufacturer. Anything involving people’s pets leads to highly emotional situations, especially when things don’t go the way pet owners are hoping. I’ve dealt with people on some of the worst days of their lives. This leads to a lot of heated interactions.

You’re absolutely right, your coworker’s choice to give in to this man’s tantrum is not how that should have been handled. It rewards Karen’s nasty behavior, and it sends the wrong message to other customers. Staying calm, explaining policies simply, and not becoming defensive or arguing points that don’t matter is important. My golden rule is to avoid letting a customer get a reaction out of me by all means necessary. I usually tire them out with calm kindness and repetition, because they’re used to making people uncomfortable to get their way. I’ve got all day, Karen. At least I’m getting paid for this, while they’re wasting their own time.

Oh lord, we’re all suffering in some way. You don’t get to have a pity party and get manipulative when someone says something that challenges your self destructive and toxic beliefs. If you’re so fragile in the face of having your viewpoints challenged, then you certainly came to an interesting space.

Why do you expect things around you to change if you’re not willing to make changes yourself?

It is, but you’re being obtuse. You don’t want to make the effort for whatever reason. Maybe it’s fear. Regardless, when it comes to struggles, choosing to do nothing and suffer is an active choice. You’re not a passenger in your own life, and not waiting for someone else to come along and provide direction is the only way you’re going to get anywhere new.

It’s okay to feel the feelings, but ruminating isn’t going to solve this problem.

Bish, bye.

Who in the sweet fuck is boning to Barry Manilow?!

I work in an office providing customer support for a small pet food manufacturer. I assist customers over the phone, email, and a live chat function on our website. So many people assume I’m AI in chat, which makes sense. A surprising number think I’m a bot when they call in, because I guess my voice sounds like a recording.

Most of the time it’s just a funny moment at the start of our interaction, but especially in chat, people can be downright nasty. I can’t believe the abuse people hurl out when they assume it’s not an actual human on the other end. When I reply in a way that is polite, but makes it clear a person is interacting with them, I have never gotten a response back.

It’s not a huge deal, but it still sucks to read the nasty shit people say. I can also understand people’s exhaustion with being forced to deal with robots from my own experiences when I’ve needed support as a customer. I also get feedback every day from people thankful to be able to call or write in and get an actual person listening to and helping them. If we want to continue having services like this, we need to make sure we’re treating the people offering them decently so they want to continue offering that to us.

If the 400 cats (assuming domestic cats) can work together as a unit, then I believe they can do anything. Knowing cats, though, I’m going to back the other competitors.

God’s perfect killing machine is the pinnacle of cat “breeds”. It’s heartbreaking seeing people do to cats what we’ve done to dogs with selective breeding for purely cosmetic traits.

Facing the day can look like whatever you need it to to get to Tuesday. Getting up, taking care of your body by feeding it, drinking water, and practicing good hygiene can be enough. Caring for your mental health with compassion and understanding is also very important.

Doing what you need to do to keep yourself safe and comfortable is the top priority right now. Having a medical condition is not your fault, and it’s nothing you should feel any shame about. You’re not feeling well, and that means you need to give yourself the space and grace to heal and feel better. However you need to achieve this, as long as you aren’t harming yourself or others, is perfectly valid.

Please try to be kind to yourself and focus on healthy coping mechanisms. You have an appointment coming soon, and help is just a few days away. If you need emergency care in the meantime, that’s okay, too. You’ve got this. It takes strength to get this far, and you can do this, too. Please take care.

And all lives matter, right? How else can we commandeer this conversation?